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1. Lawyers
(Humor/Humor)
... We do. Lawyer: You do? Witness: Yes, voodoo. Lawyer: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th? Witness: Yes. Lawyer: And what were you doing at that time? Lawyer: What is your date ...
...  Unfortunately some problems soon arose once again pertaining to his nose. As he pumped away (as in doing weights) his nose grew aplenty, to the amusement of mates. How could anyone love him with a nose ...
3. Little Boy
(Humor/Humor)
A little boy walks into his parents room one morning and finds that his dad is having sex with his mom.  So the little boy asked what his dad was doing to his mom.  The dad says "I'm playing Poker."  Then ...
... everywhere.  There's blood gushing out all over, it's horrible.  The chief is appalled, and asks, "my God almighty, what are you doing?" The New Yorker says, "So much for your canoe, you stupid fuck!" ...
5. Laundry
(Humor/Humor)
... of their sexual inexperience they were a bit uncomfortable discussing the subject so they came up with the term "doing the laundry" to use in place of "making love" or "having sex". This made them both ...
6. Two Cajuns
(Humor/Humor)
... His wife asks him what he's doing, and he replies, "I am finally going to get to go over there and kick that damn Clarence's butt..."  He sets out to cross the river and his wife watches him go, then ...
7. Random
(Humor/Humor)
... wondering if there is a dog.   -------------------------------------------- What do you call a blond doing a handstand?   A brunette with bad breath.  Why did God create Man? Because she couldn't figure ...
... $15 each. 18. Send email to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing.  For      example "If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathroom." 19. No matter what anyone asks you, reply "Okay." 20. ...
... [uh huh, I see...] throughout and if they ask you what you're doing, pull a #7) If     they're still there when you are done, Ask them if they would please kindly leave     as you have a hot date in ten ...
... friends.  Concerned about  this the doctor asked the boy if there was anything he might  have been doing that put him at risk for AIDS.  The boy thought  for a while then said questioningly, "I've been ...
... work at a job that doesn't have a modem involved (am I lucky or what?)  .....your dog leaves you  .....you have to ask what year it is(what year is it anyway)  .....you are doing things more and more that ...
12. Diary of an AOL User.
(Humor/Humor)
... I know everyone will want to read my favorite poem so I included it. I'm also going to add that short story I like. August 14 - Some guy suspended my account because of what I was doing. I told him I ...
13. IMPORTANT QUESTIONS:
(Humor/Humor)
... light fixtures? When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we ...
14. NEW OFFICE POLICY
(Humor/Humor)
... you are doing well financially and therefore do not need a raise. 3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need ...
15. Kids Are Quick
(Humor/Humor)
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ? CLASS: Maria. TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on ...
... is adjourned as he reaches for keyboard, Web browser, and Tums. 10:30 am Tell Louie he's doing great job. Offer to show him mainframe corporate PBX system sometime. 11:00 am Lunch.  4:55 pm Return from ...
17. Obituary for Common Sense
(Humor/Humor)
... and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.   Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job they themselves failed to do in disciplining ...
...        Do the dishes  147.       Do the janitor thing  148.       Do the Johnson and ball dance  149.       Do yourself  150.       Dog off  151.       Doing the Palm sisters  152.       Dong around ...
19. Family Stress Test
(Humor/Humor)
... day-timer to see if he can take          out the trash.  10.____ Maxwell House gives you industrial rates.     Scoring:      30 - a perfect score. Welcome to the neighborhood!      20-29 - You are doing ...
20. Dear Believer
(Humor/Humor)
... Dancing.  The Eleven Lords A Leaping have knocked up The Eight Maids A Milking, and The Nine Pipers Piping have been arrested for doing weird things to The Seven Swans A Swimming and The Six Geese A Laying. ...
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